Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32

The next morning I was up at 6:00. I was anxious to see if Ruth and Jeanne had responded to my email. Ruth and Jeanne were in the central time zone. I was in the Pacific zone. At home it was 8:00 AM. Ruth would just be getting to work. The previous day, I’d sent my email at 4:00 PM Pacific time. By then Ruth had probably already gone home for the day. This morning she would most likely tend to the firm’s business before she’d read my email. She was a good employee. Jeanne was also dedicated to the law firm that employed her. She would certainly take care of her employer’s business before she took the time to address her personal concerns. Realizing that it was unlikely that I’d hear from Ruth before noon, I took a shower, dressed and went out for breakfast. After breakfast I took a stroll through Lincoln Park. By the time I got back to my motel room, it was 12:30. I turned on my computer. There was an email from Ruth. Barely able to contain my excitement I opened it. Michael, Jeanne called me few minutes ago. She just read your email. You made her very happy. Michael, she wants to talk to you. I think you should let her. This is a complicated situation. It’s too complicated for emails, especially emails that I’m passing along to each of you. Right now, you’re trying to maintain some distance from Jeanne and I understand why, but if you talk to her this one time I believe that she’ll respect your desire to be left alone and not badger you with additional telephone calls. She’s waiting to hear from me. If you refuse to talk to her she’ll send me an email and I’ll forward it to you. I hope you don’t make her do that. I think you’ve both reached a point where you need to talk directly to each other. Please let me know what you want to do. Ruth I sat back and considered Ruth’s suggestion. I had to agree with her. Jeanne and I had reached a point where we needed to talk. Still, I was concerned. For my plan to work, Jeanne and I had to maintain some distance. I missed her and I was quite certain that she missed me. It would be easy to slip into a routine of talking to each other every night. And then it came to me. It was really quite simple. I typed an email to Ruth. Ruth You’re right, Jeanne and I do need to talk. I’ve thought of a way we can do it and still preserve the distance I feel we need at this time. She can call my motel room phone. When you talk to Jeanne, suggest that she wait until she gets home to make the call. I suspect it will turn out to be a long call. She’ll want to be comfortable and in a place where she won’t be disturbed. If Jeanne has plans after work today, tell her that we can always talk tomorrow or any evening when she’s free. If that does turn out to be the case, let me know so I won’t be waiting for her call. Please remind her that it doesn’t matter how late she calls. It’s two hours earlier here. Once again thank you for acting as our intermediary. Michael I then added the name of the motel where I was staying, my room number and the motel’s telephone number. After sending the email, I glanced at my wrist watch. It was just after 1:00. Needing to kill time, I went for another walk. It was 2:00 when I returned to my motel room. I immediately checked my email. There was a reply from Ruth. I anxiously opened it. Michael, Thank you; when I read your email to Jeanne she actually screamed with delight. I hope she didn’t disturb her bosses. Those attorneys she works for pay her very well, but they’re an uptight bunch. Jeanne will call you as soon as she gets home today. She thought it would be around 6:00. That would make it 4:00 on the west coast. Michael, I believe you’re doing the right thing. Try to listen to Jeanne and understand. I urged her to do the same thing. Ruth Now nervous with anticipation, I stood up and began pacing around my motel room. It was going to happen. I was going to talk to Jeanne. I had two hours to kill. The wait was going to be unbearable. I’d already taken two walks, I couldn’t tolerate another one and I knew that a walk wouldn’t be an adequate distraction. Reading and watching television wouldn’t work either. I tried playing solitaire on my computer. I immediately lost interest in the game. Finally, out of desperation I watched a Julia Ann movie on my computer. As I watched the movie, I imagined that it was Jeanne and her latest date. While it did help pass the time, it had an added benefit. I wanted Jeanne to know that I was trying hard to learn to accept and even enjoy her new lifestyle. Having a little sexual edge would help with that. The movie featured Julia Ann and a man in his mid to late twenties. They were playing on a couch in a living room. As I watched Julia Ann suck her costar’s cock I imagined sitting in our den watching a baseball game while Jeanne was in the living room with her date sucking his cock. I had to admit that the image excited me. At five minutes to four I turned off the movie. I didn’t want to be distracted while I talked with Jeanne. After shutting my computer down I sat next to the telephone and waited. Four o’clock arrived. In the central time zone it was six o’clock. The telephone didn’t ring. I continued to wait. The time dragged by. Fifteen minutes later Jeanne still hadn’t called. I assumed that she’d been delayed by traffic. I continued to wait. At 6:30 I stood up and started pacing the room. I kept telling myself that Jeanne had most likely been delayed by traffic or her job. Occasionally almanbahis şikayet at the end of a workday, one of the attorneys would need to have several documents prepared. When that happened, Jeanne had to stay until everything was finished. Still the icy fingers of doubt and fear began to insinuate their way into my thoughts. Was it possible that Jeanne’s latest date had called at the last minute and invited her to stop for an after work cocktail? As I was considering the likelihood of that occurrence, the telephone rang. It was 6:40. My fears and doubts vanished. Grinning, I answered the telephone. “Hello.” “Michael?” “Jeanne?” “Yes, it’s me.” “It’s me, too.” Jeanne giggled. “I guess we’ve figured out that it’s us.” I laughed. “Yeah, we’ll be stars at the old people’s home.” There was a moment of silence and then Jeanne said, “I hope we’ll be there together.” “I do too, Jeanne.” “Do you, Michael? Even after all the stupid things I’ve done.” “Yes, Jeanne, I do. I’m glad you called.” “Thank you for allowing me to call. I’m sorry I’m late. Carl Boyer needed a contract typed. It had to be done today.” “I thought that was probably what happened. Don’t worry, I understand.” “Thank you.” “Would you like to talk?” “Yes, very much.” There was a brief pause and then Jeanne said. “Michael, I’m so sorry about the way I handled all of this. I really was stupid.” “Jeanne, during the course of our marriage we’ve both made mistakes.” “That’s true, but you’ve never made a mistake of the magnitude of the one I just made.” “While I’ll concede that, it’s been done and there’s nothing we can do about it. I’m choosing to forget that it happened and try to move on.” “Are you coming home?” “No, Jeanne, I’m not.” “Why not? In your email it sounded like you were actually encouraging me to continue dating. You said that it was okay for me to entertain men in our house. You offered to give me money to turn Tricia’s room into a play room.” “Yes, that was exactly what I said and I am trying to accept what you’re doing. I’m even trying to get to a point where I enjoy what you’re doing, but I’m not there yet. I need more time.” “I see.” The disappointment in Jeanne’s voice was evident. “Jeanne, I’m going to ask you to do something for me.” “Yes, of course; anything, anything at all.” “If we’re eventually going to be able to work this out, we have to be totally honest with each other. Can you do that?’ “Of course I can.” “You can’t hold anything back.” “Michael, where are you going with this?” Suddenly there was a tone of wariness in Jeanne’s voice. “Promise me, Jeanne.” “Why, Michael? What are you going to ask me?” “Anything and everything.” “Why? I thought you forgave me.” “I did. Now I’m trying to figure out a way for both of us to be happy.” “We can be happy, Michael. I’ll stop dating. I’ve gotten it out of my system. I don’t need to do it anymore. As soon as you come home, I’ll show you how much I love you.” “It’s not that easy, Jeanne. When you started this, you opened a box. Whether it’s a Pandora’s box filled with pain and recrimination or a gift box filled with joy and excitement remains to be seen. What I do know is now that you’ve opened the box we have to confront it.” “No, Michael, it will be just like it used to be only better. I’ve learned to love sex. I promise I’ll make you the happiest man in the world.” “I wish it was that easy, I really do, but it’s not. Now it’s a matter of trust. Every time you’re late coming home from work, every time you go out with the girls, every time I have to go out of town for business, I’ll worry that you’re meeting a man for sex.” “No, Michael, you can trust me.” “Can I? Haven’t you reveled in the freedom you’ve had during the past three months? You’ve dated a number of men and enjoyed them all. Won’t that be hard to give up?” “Michael, I…” “No, Jeanne, you don’t have to tell me the answers. These questions are for you. Think about it; can I really trust you? That Saturday I caught you with Derek Fischer in our bed, you told me that you weren’t planning to have sex with him. You made the mistake of letting him kiss you and you melted.” Jeanne sighed. I pressed. “Can you honestly promise me that it won’t occur again? It might happen like this. You’ll go out with the other secretaries in your building for a drink after work. You enjoy doing that. One of your old dates will be in the bar. It will be an accident. Neither of you knew the other one would be there. You liked him. You’ll talk. You’ll have an extra drink. You’ll dance a couple of dances. After you’re finished dancing you won’t return to the table of secretaries, you’ll go to a table of your own. After all, he was a friend. You’ll want to talk.” Jeanne didn’t attempt to refute what I was saying, she just listened. “He’ll lead you to a secluded booth in a dark corner of the bar. When you sit down, you’ll sit on the same side of the booth. You’ll cuddle up to him. You’ll feel guilty, but he’s a big man. His arms are so comfortable. You’ll talk. You’ll flirt. It will feel good to flirt again. He’ll kiss you. You’ll kiss him back. While you’re kissing him, he’ll cup your breast. You’ll know that you should stop him, but you won’t want to stop him. Instead you’ll let your hand brush across his erect penis.” “Please, Micheal, don’t.” “Jeanne I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m trying to explain.” I paused. After a moment I asked, “Can you promise me that a situation like that will never occur?” almanbahis canlı casino Jeanne whispered, “You know I can’t.” “So every time you go out without me, I’ll have to worry.” “Michael, what are we going to do? I love you. I want to be with you.” “I want to be with you too, Jeanne.” “But you can’t trust me.” “Trust is only an issue if I’m asking you to do things you can’t do.” “I don’t understand.” “Maybe we can find a way for us to be together that allows you to continue dating other men.” “Michael, you’re confusing me. In your email you suggested that you were maybe willing to accept my dating, but then you started talking about trust… Michael, I’m so sorry I started all of this.” “I’m not.” “Michael, be serious.” “I mean it, I’m not sorry this happened. In fact, I think it had to happen. You were ready for it to happen. You needed it to happen. Yes, I do wish you had included me in the process that led you to this, but you didn’t and now that’s history.” “I really am sorry about that.” “Don’t worry, I understand. It was something that happened gradually for you.” “It was. It started when the girls began telling me about they’re dates when they were in college.” “They were sexually active.” “Very.” “And you envied them.” “Not at first. At first I was shocked. I tried to talk to them, but my attempts to talk quickly degenerated into lectures. I spouted the same puritanical nonsense that had been drilled into me when I was a young girl. The lectures quickly turned into arguments. Gradually the arguments turned into debates and I started to lose the debates. Eventually we just talked, and then the girls started to teach me.” “Why didn’t you tell me about this?” “The girls asked me not to.” “Why? I’m their father.” “That’s exactly why. It’s difficult for girls to talk about sex with their father.” “If you’d told me, we might have been able to go through this together. We might not be where we are now. It’s not good for a husband and wife to keep secrets from each other. “I know.” “It’s okay.” I paused for a moment and then I said, “We keep getting sucked into talking about the past. We can’t change the past. All we can do is try to influence what happens in the future.” “I need you to forgive me.” “You’re already forgiven.” “You’ve forgiven me for being stupid, but you haven’t forgiven me for being a prude.” “I don’t understand.” “Michael, for twenty-seven years I was a cold fish in bed. The few times I gave you a blow job, I did it so grudgingly that it couldn’t have been very much fun for you. I didn’t enjoy sex. It had nothing to do with you. I’ve learned that you’ve always been a wonderful, caring lover. I was just too inhibited to enjoy what you were trying to do.” Jeanne paused. After a moment, she said, “And now I’m eagerly doing things for men I barely know that I refused to do for you. You’re the man I love. Michael, I feel awful about that. And now you’re gone, so I can’t even try to make it up to you.” “It’s okay, I think I understand.” “You do?” “Yes, a woman gave me a pretty good explanation about why that happens.” “A woman? Do I know her?” “No, I met her in a bar the night before that ill fated Saturday.” “You met her in a bar? Did you sleep with…” Jeanne stopped herself in mid sentence. “Listen to me. Isn’t that the height of hypocrisy.” “It’s okay, we’re both getting used to a new life style and no I didn’t sleep with her. Her name is Jennifer Rawlins. Would you like to hear what she told me?” “Yes, please.” I told Jeanne the details of my conversation with Jennifer Rawlins. When I was finished Jeanne said, “That’s a pretty good explanation. It clarifies something for me.” “What’s that?” “I’ll tell you, but you have to promise you won’t get mad.” “We have to be totally honest with each other, Jeanne. That means that we also have to try to hear the truth without getting angry. I’ll do my best.” “Okay, when I went out with Derek I was still too ashamed to reveal my new sexual desires to you, but with him it was easy. Until now I haven’t been able to understand why. I didn’t even really like Derek. He just happened to be in the right place at the right time.” “You’re telling me that he was a convenient practice partner.” “That’s exactly what he was.” “It’s hard to free ourselves from the cultural restraints that were ingrained in us while we were growing up, isn’t it?” “Yes, Michael, it really is.” “Right now I’m struggling with that same demon.” “You are? How?” “In our culture real men don’t share their wives with other men.” Jeanne was silent. After a moment she said, “I’m sorry, Michael. I never really thought about how this was affecting you. I assumed that your only problem was overcoming petty jealousy. There’s a much bigger issue, isn’t there.” “Yes, Jeanne, there is.” “In its own way, it’s every bit as inhibiting as the prudish restraints that are pounded into women as they grow up. How are you doing with it?” “It’s a struggle, but I’m working at it. I’m making some progress. We’re having this conversation.” “Yes, we are. You are making progress. I’ve always known that you’re a very special man, but I’m just beginning to realize how special you really are.” There was more silence. Both of us realized that because this was a battle I was currently fighting, conversation about it would be tense and potentially volatile. Artfully changing the subject, Jeanne said, “Tell me more about the cocktail lounge where you met this Rawlins almanbahis casino woman.” “Jeanne, are you jealous?” “Michael, I just…” Jeanne paused for a moment and then she said, “Yes, I suppose I am.” “As you mentioned earlier, that’s a little hypocritical of you, isn’t it.” “Yes, Michael, it is, but there’s a difference for men and women.” “Go on.” “There aren’t many men who would view me as marriage material.” “Why?” “I’m too old for most younger men.” “What about all that MILF stuff?” “Michael, MILF means mothers I’d like to fuck, not mothers I’d like to marry.” “Okay, what about older men?” “Older men, especially older men with money are looking for younger women.” “Trophy wives.” “That’s right.” “I don’t believe all older men are looking for trophy wives. There have to be some older men who are just looking for a good mate.” “There are, but those men aren’t interested in me, at least not as a wife.” “Why?” “Because I’m a slut.” “That’s a harsh label.” “Thank you, but I don’t agree. In fact, I kind of like it. Define slut.” Understanding where Jeanne was going, I laughed and said, “It’s a woman who freely enjoys sex with a variety of partners.” “Michael, I’m sorry if this upsets you, but at this point in my life that’s exactly what I want to be.” “That’s the first time you’ve actually admitted that to me.” There was a moment of silence and then Jeanne said, “That may be the first time I’ve actually admitted it to myself. I’ve been trying to convince myself that this is just a brief adventure, but I know it’s not. I’m sorry, Michael, but I enjoy being a slut.” “I’m glad you’re finally admitting it. Now we have to figure out a way for both of us to live with that reality. That’s the heart of our problem.” “Yes it is. Michael, I’m so sorry. I wish…” “Jeanne, you don’t need to apologize. It’s your life. You get to decide what you want to do with it. I love you. If this is what you want, then I’m going to encourage you to do it. When we’re old I don’t want you to feel like you missed something.” “But what about you, Michael? This affects you too.” “Yes it does, and I’ll eventually have to make decisions about my own life. I do know that I would prefer to spend the rest of my life with you. Whether or not I can find a way to do that remains to be seen. Please believe me when I tell you that I intend to try very hard. “Thank you, Michael; please believe me, I want that every bit as much as you do.” “Okay, back to the question we were discussing. You’re a slut, why does that make you less appealing as a wife?” As soon as I said it I understood. Jeanne said, “Because…” “Excuse me, I don’t mean to interrupt you, but I think I just got it.” “You’ve always been a bright man. Tell me what you’re thinking.” “They’re confronted by the same problem that’s vexing me.” “That’s right, they know I won’t be faithful to them. They don’t want to take on the baggage of a philandering wife.” I started laughing. Jeanne asked, “What’s so funny?” “You just shattered one of my two greatest fears.” “Explain.” “I was afraid that you might fall in love with one of your boyfriends and decide to marry him.” “But now you understand just how unlikely that is.” “Yes.” “Michael, I can’t imagine ever developing an emotional attachment to another man that’s stronger than the one I have with you, but if it ever does happen, please understand that it could only be a temporary infatuation.” “It would still hurt.” “You do understand that it’s much more likely to occur with you.” “You’re talking about women throwing themselves at me.” “Women who are looking for a husband. You are fabulous husband material.” “I’m married.” “You are, but I’m not making any effort to hide my new life style.” “You’re telling me that people are going to talk.” “I’m sorry, Michael, I really am; but they already are.” “Yes, I’m sure the neighbors see the men coming to our house.” “Baby, I’m sorry. This is the life I want to lead and…” “No, it’s okay. This is why I have to stay away. This is part of my journey. I either have to learn to live with your new life style or I have to…” “Michael, that’s why women are going to be throwing themselves at you. They’ll see you as vulnerable.” “Jeanne, if we do end up separating, I promise you that I’ll never marry another woman.” “When I make that same promise to you, you don’t believe me. Why should I believe you?” “And this is why I have to be gone for an entire year. We need time to reestablish just how important we are to each other.” “But during that time, you could fall in love with another woman, divorce me and marry her.” “And while I’m gone, you could decide that I’m an unnecessary burden that keeps you from fully enjoying life as a free loving libertine.” “No, Michael, I need you. You’ll never be a burden to me.” “And I’ll never fall in love with another woman.” “Michael, what are we going to do?” “We’re going to start working on building our new relationship.” “How are we going to do that? You’re gone.” “You have to start living the life you really want to live. If you want to be a slut, then you need to be a slut. You can’t hold back.” “Won’t that make things worse?” “No, it won’t. It’s the only way this can work. Jeanne, I’ve thought about it. The only thing wrong with what you’re doing is that it violates the accepted moral conventions of our culture. You’ve decided that those moral conventions aren’t valid. Any compromises you make in the life you want to lead are compromises to beliefs that you’ve rejected. I fear those compromises could eventually cause you to feel dissatisfied. Even worse, if you view me as the cause of those compromises it might eventually lead you to feel resentment and even anger towards me.

Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32